Those of us whose wives chase errant politicians are often represented for what we are not. Since all right-thinking men know that women need to exercise their intellectual faculties as extensively as men, that the government has instituted various programs to see that women have their say, and that we have enough second-class citizens without adding women, then who can deny that these misrepresentations of LWV husbands are curious fictions?
Alas, many LWV husbands are ghosts manufactured by Leaguers as the Necessary. Excuse. Surely these husbands don't really exist:
Joe Snakeeye who keeps a sharp watch on the state of his wife's health and decides that her digestion must be improved by having meals on time when the City Council is meeting; that the children are threatened by flu whenever there's a night unit meeting; and that the TV needs a babysitter when the Annual Report has to be written.
Peter Nervousrabbit who fears for the welfare of the family goldfish when he's at the office and she has a morning board meeting to discuss the local agenda proposal.
Mr. Clean whose views are disposable.
The Alaska Sportsman who decides on Friday before the State Convention that the whole family needs to go on an Elk-hunt 'way up North for the next ten days.
Mr. Mediaeval who believes that the fair Ermintrude should stay in the castle, guard the pantry against raids by wicked serve, supervise the cauldrons of pepper-stew, and practice the lute in preparation for a visit by the Duke of Burgundy.
Manfred Moonlight who, seeing all the study and lobbying involving the LWV, asks why his wife doesn't go to work and earn money with all that energy. Usually he suggests something like point polishing in a pin factory.
The Noble Athenian who believes wives should stay sequestered far from the politicians roaring in the Agora, grow fat, and preserve the purity of their ignorance during
a short, unhealthy life.
Thomas a Go-go who has his wife join every organization in the telephone book in order to arrive at the point where all interests are no interest.
Alonzo Knowall who votes by intuition and instructions from TV ads anyway.
Of course, such fictional ingenuity must be stimulated by something. Perhaps women are cleverer for having joined the LWV.